‘We want to be loved’: Panel supports 2SLGBTQ+ Italian Canadians

Navigating different identities is not always easy, but the “How Can We Support Italo-Queer Montrealers” panel is trying to help.

The panel was created by writer Elvira Truglia, PFLAG Montreal and Italo-Queer Montreal to give a voice to people who identify as Italian-Canadian and 2SLGBTQIA+. It provides discussions and perspectives from a variety of people.

“As an artist, as a comic, I talk about my family, including a child that is of the queer community,” said comedian Franco Taddeo. “My job is to be funny, but also if I can shine light on different aspects of our culture, you know I’m using my hands because we’re Italian, then I find I have this opportunity to be representative. And I try to take advantage of it through humour.”

Taking part in the panel discussion were fathers, mothers, sisters, friends, and grandmothers, like Domenica Pulcini.

“My grandchild came to me spontaneously at 12 years old and shared that he was transgender,” said Pulcini, a retired family life educator. “My worry was how will he be treated, how will he be perceived, how will the world treat him at school, worrying about suicide, about bullying. I really was very preoccupied, but at the same time all I wanted to do was hug him and let him know that I’m your nonna forever, love you forever, no matter what.

“It’s not about us. We’re just there to support and encourage. It’s their life. It’s their journey.”

Elvira Truglia, who has been advocating for years in support of social inclusion, community development and human rights, is one of the organizers of the event, but also a member of a queer family. Truglia explains how social pressure plays a big role among the members of the Italian community, often too worried about the so-called “bella figura” — the need to make a good impression.

“One of the things we want to do tonight is sort of to open up that definition and maybe say that we want to redefine what that means to make a good impression,” said Truglia.

“Montreal’s Italian community, we’re very close to our traditions,” added Christopher Diraddo, co-founder of Italo Queer Montreal. “And I think a part of that is the tradition of family and having a family. And so, I can kind of see that there is still maybe some people out there who think of family in only a particular narrow way. But what we want is for people to realize is that people have all different types of families. And that our families are just as valid as other families.”

For Maria Arcobelli Sacco, events like the one organized at the Italian Cultural Institute of Montreal are more important now than ever.

“Today I feel like we’re sort of going a little backwards and it’s worrisome for our families, for our friends, for our colleagues, so we have to stay together,” said Arcobelli Sacco, Montreal chapter leader at Pflag Canada.

“At the end of the day, we live in community and we want to be loved and we want to be accepted,” added Truglia. “And so the thought of perhaps not being accepted creates a lot of pressure and creates a lot of barriers.”